Farmer's Tan

Disclaimer, I'm a skinny fella Spending hot days under an umbrella But I got a bit of a dilemma Spent a minute on the beach, a condition developed Somebody forgot the Coppertone (Itchy, scratchy) Like a show within a show Standing firm on the point of no return Thin line redder than a sunburn My forearm got third place But what my bicep doing in the first place? (Don't know) Lemme tell ya, better hope and pray somebody brought some armor Else somebody end up looking like a farmer It's just what the affliction's called If I'm being perfectly honest man I'd rather be bald But that's probably not smart, I apparently burn easy My head would be red and I'd rather be dead, unnh Now I am a lovely shade of rouge Aloe Vera lotion, that's my truth Got me wearing T-shirts in the pool Thought I brought my sunblock but Now I went and got myself (Got myself a farmer's tan) Now I went and got myself (A noticeable farmer's tan) My appendage neapolitan My whole arm flip-flopping like a politician Getting rays like I do good work (Good work) But why'd I have to go and wear a short sleeve shirt? Now I sizzle like a reel Technicolor visible from here, wondering if it'll heal Silver lining in a sky with no clouds I'm kinda shy and look buff, I'll Even Stevens it out I'm gonna find me a lounge, I'm gonna sit myself down I'm gonna cook out like a burger till I average it out And if you're wondering how I'm gonna turn it around I'm gonna stay out every day now till the sun'll go down but dammit I overdid it Somehow reversed my affliction If you're going for the golden while avoiding the cancer Better take it to a sprayer, that's the number one answer, ahh Now I am a lovely shade of rouge Aloe Vera lotion, that's my truth Got me wearing T-shirts in the pool Thought I brought my sunblock but Now I went and got myself (Got myself a farmer's tan) Now I went and got myself (A noticeable farmer's tan) Please somebody call an ambulance Cuz lemme tell ya man, the burns, I can't handle this Using so much coverup, it's so scandalous You got a weather app, how come you didn't plan for this? It's OK if you're uneven Only gotta deal with ridicule for one season Elbow down looking red like a mad demon While my bicep looking pale like an Elizabethan It's OK if you're uneven (Farmer's tan) It's OK if you're uneven It's OK (Farmer's tan)