Spilled Milk (feat. Eamon)

My papa was my hero I was always by his side When I acted out of pocket he would always let it slide I can't say all the time, I took a couple L's He went upside my head when I was putting him through hell His first heart attack, I was six years old They ain't let me near the hospital, that shit too cold So I waited by the door hoping he would get home And I was scared that he would die and we'd be left all alone And I remember that when mommy brought you home I was quiet Showing you the things around the crib like you forget 'em The doctors told me you would be good if you would chill So stop smoking stoges pop, you know they make you ill But you ain't want to listen, you was always being stubborn And that's the type of shit you let slide when you love 'em You ain't changed your diet and you stayed smoking Winstons You can't make a strong-willed man change his vision Sometimes you think something is when it isn't He was gonna die and that was his decision I could never do the same in this condition He left three sons and a wife in that position The ones we hurt when we leave The lies we live and believe You got to learn to step up And be the man that they trust Ten years old, they telling me that my father dead What the fuck was going through my father head He ain't think his youngest need his father Had a million chances to change but didn't bother It's like he ain't love me enough to live Or to selfish to make an adjustment for his kids And you ain't think you dyin' gon' divide us And you ain't think a ten year old boy needed guidance Ain't nobody talking, just bottle it up inside us And shit could turn ugly when there's no one there to guide us It's all good, I still love you, I forgive you But that ain't gon' be something my son is gon' live through He ain't gonna lose me the way I lost you 'Cause doing that to him is something I couldn't do I had to change the way I was living 'cause I was you The same hard head and the same world view I had to do a 180 and get my shit together When you a mess, pop, it's hard to get your shit together But I ain't living for myself now, it's all for him And I'm trying to be everything that you should have been The ones we hurt when we leave The lies we live and believe You got to learn to step up And be the man that they trust The ones we hurt when we leave The lies we live and believe You got to learn to step up And be the man that they trust